As I suspected, just how big I can get defies all comprehension.
This two week period was marked by a lot of happy: we spent a long weekend in Pemaquid, ME, where we visit every year and is the setting for The Wideness of the Sea. Having been inside this place in my mind so much in the last year, I felt like I might bump into my main characters around every corner. And my favorite bookstore in downtown Damariscotta took a big order of books which made me so happy. I hope to do a reading there next summer. This trip confirmed my belief that this place is magical since while I was there I nearly forgot about being huge and instead looked at the harbor filled with the sea, the wind blowing through lush trees, and the moon and stars in those velvet night skies. Nature has such a wonderful way of taking you out of yourself, uncomfortable pregnancy and all.
Unless I look down, of course:
I also had an ultrasound that showed the babies big and healthy – 2.5 lbs! And surrounded by lots of fluid which is great. It somehow flipped a switch in me and I was left with two thoughts: 1) real, big babies are in there, thus my huge stomach and all my discomfort is for a great purpose and 2) we need diapers.
I went strait from my ultrasound to Target and got everything we needed to bring babies home: diapers, wipes, binkis, burp clothes, that special detergent you need for sensitive skin. (Nesting impulses: the struggle is real). And since I am carrying twins while getting older kids ready for school, I also checked off our sports supply list too. So my cart was filled with newborn diapers and soccer gear, which is a pretty accurate depiction of my life right now.
My husband took my two oldest kids to Saratoga Springs, NY, where they were both born, to visit friends and to hold a work event at the race track. I was home with the two younger kids and it was so slow and sweet. We cleaned and swam and cuddled while we watched movies. I felt like I was drinking them in at these ages before all the changes that are about to take place and I will turn around and they will be 8 and 5 instead of 7 and 4. One early evening, while we were still in our bathing suits after swimming, we stopped at their favorite Chinese buffet for an early dinner. Sitting there with nothing else to focus on but them, my heart was alternately a mushy mess and a ball of laughter – they are so sweet, and so ridiculously funny. Andrew tried every dumpling they had, and they were overjoyed at the giant cubes of jello for dessert. I left dinner on a cloud of happiness, that was followed up by early showers, pjs, and a quick show before an early bedtime. Not sure if a more perfect evening exists for a 28 week pregnant mom.
I took advantage of the quieter days to organize all the baby stuff and finish washing and folding all the newborn baby clothes (read: do something productive while sitting down). By the time the big kids got home I was done, and it felt like something major was accomplished. Then it was time to turn to fun, and get ready for my friends from BC to come visit. Going out to buy wine and beer and BBQ food felt so good, even if it took every ounce of energy I had. We had this visit on the books for a while, and in my mind it always felt like by the time it rolled around it would be almost time for the twins to come, so it made it all seem very real.
Their visit was so sweet, though one of my friends had problems getting a flight to Boston due to thunderstorms and couldn’t come (how? what?). We missed her, but were so glad to have such a sweet weekend of berries and ice cream and swimming and lobster rolls. Nothing is better then friends that fill you right up, except maybe watching your kids love each other too. And as proof of how much fun we had I took zero pictures that weekend.
New logistical challenges: We got a washer and dryer that easily does 3xs the amount of laundry our old ones did. But I can barely get in front of them because of my tummy. In parking lots I have to walk extra far since I can’t fit between most cars. And bending down or getting up from sitting is comical. I have really relied on Blanqi Leggings and a support belly band lately because the weight of these little boys plus all their in utero accessories is really hard to carry.
But I am still thankful to be sleeping well. And for feeling these sweet boys moving around. Our au pair comes in 3 weeks so now it is the great room shuffle: renovated attic version. We will head up for one last summer soak up to our condo in the White Mountains, where I plan to best my 11 year old at chess, watch them all splash in rivers that look like they are right out of A River Runs Through It, and sit with my husband on the porch, in rocking chairs, after they all go to sleep, and listen to the stillness, the calm before the storm.